Life as a Hagerty transgender student, explained

Editor’s note: This article could have published in The BluePrint, the student newspaper for Hagerty High School. Seminole County Public Schools board policy 5722 gives administrators the right to exercise prior restraint of school newspapers among other publications, and according to Florida state statutes, a person’s sex is a biological trait, and it is false to refer to them as a gender that conflicts with it. Due to the risk of such an article being associated with a public school, the story was denied publication by the school. In their own publication, The BluePrint staff wrote an opinion piece about student censorship. 

Read an in-depth editor’s note, detailing the deep thought and considerations that the Oviedo Community Newsteam had in publishing this article which, if allowed, would have originally published in The BluePrint to highlight a “visible but unacknowledged group of students” during Transgender Awareness Week in November as part of a larger effort by the newspaper to highlight the experiences of different groups of people. OCN rarely uses anonymous sources and only promises anonymity to a person in an article if revealing their identity might cause them harm. Read our Ethics Policy here. All students in this article have been given pseudonyms to ensure their privacy and safety. This is indicated by a placeholder name and an asterisk. 

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John* wakes up before dawn each morning to walk his dogs. He catches the bus to school, where he sits through AP classes, contributes to class discussion and makes an effort to chat with his classmates. He spends a few hours participating in extracurricular clubs at school and makes it home with enough time to finish schoolwork and maybe hang out with a friend. He likes to draw, write and spend time in nature. 

John belongs to a community surrounded by controversy. He does not drink, sell drugs or even drive after curfew — but the mention of his experiences elicits debate and negative attention more reliably than nearly any other topic. 

John is transmasculine, meaning he was assigned female at birth, but now presents as male. “Transgender” applies as an umbrella term to any person whose gender does not align with their biological sex. According to the Yale School of Medicine, “sex” is determined by the characteristics one is born with, while “gender” is determined by a person’s psychology and social/cultural experiences. If these two do not match up, a person is transgender.

The transgender community has grown more visible among students, with a 2022 survey by the Pew Research Center finding that 5% of youth and 1.6% of total adults identify as transgender. According to a paper from the Williams Law Institute, the figure of total adults was estimated as 0.3% in 2011 and as 0.6% in 2016. (It is important to note, though, that evidence of transgender people exists from as far back as 2800 BCE, and is present in numerous cultures.) In spite of the trans community’s long history and recent openness, they face considerable legal and social opposition. 

“My [siblings] know [that I’m trans, and] all my friends know,” John said. “More or less, my family doesn’t. … My parents don’t really understand it, and it would be a lot of effort to try to explain it. And I’m not really sure how well they would take it if they actually did understand it.”

Important words to know 

● Transgender (or “trans”): A person whose biological sex differs from their gender identity.

● Trans man/transmasculine person: Someone who was assigned female at birth, but is male/masculine in gender. 

● Trans woman/transfeminine person: Someone who was assigned male at birth, but is female/feminine in gender. 

● Nonbinary: A term for someone who identifies as neither a woman nor man. 

● Gender fluid: A term for someone whose gender changes (typically between male and female) throughout periods of time. 

● Demi-girl: Someone whose gender fluctuates between feminine and androgynous. 

● Demi-boy: Someone whose gender fluctuates between masculine and androgynous. 

● Cisgender: Someone whose biological sex aligns with their gender. Someone who is not transgender. 

● Dysphoria: A feeling of discomfort caused by a disconnect between one’s gender and their physical body. 

● Sex: A distinction between male and female based on biological characteristics. 

● Gender: Someone’s place on the spectrum of masculinity to femininity based on their social, cultural and psychological experiences. 

Who am I?

According to the Pew Research Center, 33% of transgender adults first felt that their assigned gender did not accurately describe them before the age of 10, and 81% considered the possibility by the age of 17. Oftentimes, this process begins with discomfort, or a desire to embrace a different gender presentation as a young child, which can be caused by feelings of gender dysphoria, a feeling described by the National Library of Medicine as “severe or persistent distress associated with an incongruence between one’s gender identity and biological sex.” The NLM estimates that 0.6% of Americans experience this condition, “most frequently…in early teenage years.”  However, at such young ages, transgender individuals often lack the exact words to describe their experiences. 

“Gender wise, I definitely would have realized sooner if I knew what [being transgender] was,” John said. “Like when I was younger, I wanted to have short hair, [as early as] when I was four or five.”

Jane* began to distance herself from the typical masculine characteristics she observed as early as kindergarten, in part because of negative experiences with her father, and in part due to an internal desire to present as feminine and a general discomfort with her gender assigned at birth.

“[My identity is] rather strongly based on an aversion to representing male characteristics,” Jane said. “So generalizations and ideas that typically apply to traditional males are things that I don’t want to apply to me. … There are very, very few things that bother me, but one of which is being called a ‘man.’ That is kind of painful to hear, because it represents lots of generalizations that I don’t want to.”

Once Jane learned about the LGBTQ+ community and began to understand gender differently, she also explored her own gender identity. After a gradual process of consideration throughout eighth and ninth grade, she came to the conclusion that she was transgender, and began to refer to herself with she/her pronouns.

The transition process may go slowly. For some students, such as James,* the process may take many years.  James began to identify differently from his assigned gender at birth during his time in middle school. 

“I was confused,” James said. “I didn’t feel necessarily like a girl. I went through a nonbinary phase, which shifted to kind of figuring out I go by he/him.” 

While James only identified as nonbinary for a short while, for some it is a long-lasting label. Several identities, including gender fluidity, fall under the nonbinary umbrella, as the term is used to describe anyone who neither identifies as strictly male or female. Jordan* alternates between feeling feminine and androgynous. 

“I’ve been trying to figure myself out for a long time, and I am not generally a very confident person, so it took me forever just to get a haircut,” Jordan said. “As soon as I kind of clicked that together, it all just kind of felt a little bit easier.” 

Coming out

Coming out to friends or family members can be nerve-wracking, and the process takes different forms for different individuals. 

“I am not great with words, so I organized everything in a letter, which I handed to [my mother] one night,” Jake* said. “And then [I] ran to my room and started crying. But then she was super supportive and just wanted me to be happy.”

Jake has told his mother and friends about his gender, and openly embraces it on campus, going by his chosen name. Like many transgender students, he expects the process of coming out to the rest of his family to take time. 

For this reason, transgender students often begin by telling those who they trust the most. “I’m very careful with my selection of my friends, particularly in that case,” Jane said. “But birds of a feather flock together and whatnot, so I naturally fell into a friend group that had similar experiences to me. So they are accepting and supportive, because that’s the kind of thing that they’ve been through before.” 

Jane goes by her given name in school, a decision shared by several transgender students interviewed for this article—though their reasons for doing so vary. Some are simply not ready to share their identity with their teachers and peers, while others face legal barriers. In Florida schools, parents must fill out forms stating their child’s accepted names in order for teachers to refer to them as such. Effectively, for transgender students who are not out to their families, going by a chosen name in school is simply not an option.

“I don’t mention anything, because I understand how difficult it can be for people to deal with that, which is why I haven’t filled out the name deviation form,” Jane said. “I don’t want my teachers—especially poor substitutes—seeing my name on the roster and then struggling with trying to call someone that they perceive as relatively masculine a very feminine name.” 

And some students like Jordan receive mixed reactions from making their identity more apparent to most of the people they interact with. 

“People make lots of negative comments towards me, to my face, around me, behind my back,” Jordan said. “And I get a lot of that in classes that are lower levels … but in my higher level classes, it’s generally not a problem. … they’re going to be looking into things more than the people who aren’t taking higher level classes. So if you look more into things, the more you see what you believe is right and wrong.” 

Due to the increased visibility of trans students on campus, they can more easily find each other, and many enjoy befriending students also in the LGBTQ+ community. “I’ve been fine being different for a really long time,” Jake said. “But having people that are the same kind of different has helped me be more comfortable with that.” 

In particular, Hagerty’s Unity Alliance provides a space specifically for trans and LGBTQ+ students, while some form casual friend groups with others like them, or partake in hobbies and extracurriculars that attract a more diverse crowd. 

Jordan found a group of supportive friends in middle school. 

“[Being around similar people] helped me feel more safe to explore myself and to look more into things,” Jordan said. “ I feel like anywhere else I would have gone, I would have been afraid to open up, and I would have been scared to dig into something that is not widely accepted.”

Making a change

Once they feel comfortable in their identity, trans students may make changes to their appearance in order to express their gender identity, or to ease dysphoria. This can include simple changes such as wearing clothes more commonly associated with their gender, or changing their hair and makeup look. Of course, transgender individuals may dress any way that suits them, just as cisgender women sometimes wear shorts or pants, and cisgender men sometimes wear skirts or jewelry. However, far more often, transgender students switch up their style or adjust their physical appearance. 

For individuals assigned female at birth, a binder (a garment similar to a sports bra, which compresses the chest) provides a temporary way to make their appearance more masculine. 

“[Wearing a binder] definitely feels more affirming,” Jake said. “I remember the first time I put one on. I was at the mall with my friends, and I felt so much more comfortable.” 

However, wearing a binder for longer than the recommended time or not wearing it properly can result in bruising, scarring, difficulty breathing, injuries to the ribs and “pain,” according to John. Often, the recommended duration is only a few hours, which is shorter than a typical school day or work shift. However, going without a binder causes some people to feel the same dysphoria that they felt before outwardly transitioning. 

Jane often dresses in pink, a color typically associated with femininity, and has experimented with wearing feminine clothing to school. Especially for transfeminine people, responses to someone dressing closer to one’s gender identity can be extremely negative. 

“I’ve tried wearing skirts to school and such, but then I got yelled at and called a f—– and such.” 

Choosing a new name also factors into the transition process, as many transgender people stop going by their given name (also called a “dead name” in slang). Some, like Jay, shorten their given names to make them more androgynous without giving up their given name entirely. John searched baby name websites and social media, and came up with a list of several options, eliminating them until he had settled on one with a similar origin to his given name. James sought out a name with a neutral connotation, and chose the one that suited him best. 

“My dead name is very feminine, and I just didn’t really feel like I went by that,” James said. “So I chose … a more unisex name.” 

Many transgender students recall their mental state improving after they make these outward changes, or spend time with those who acknowledge their identity. Armando Simon works with the Orlando Youth Alliance to provide services and safe spaces for LGBTQ+ youth.

“It is a real highlight of their life, being able to get together with people who understand and accept them,” Simon said. “Especially if they’re coming from households or neighborhoods or cultures that refuse to accept them as they are. … We are preventing suicide long before it gets to the last day.” 

Jay* is gender fluid, meaning that he alternates between femininity and masculinity by the day or even hour. (To avoid confusion, this article will refer to Jay with he/him pronouns, but gender fluid individuals often switch their preferred pronouns throughout time.)

“Dysphoria was horrible when I was younger, because I just didn’t know what was going on,” Jay said. “But finding out what I was really helped me feel more solid. … Hearing one of my friends use my proper name brings so much joy to my heart that my normal name would never bring. My dead name would never bring me that same kind of joy.”

Though practically off the table for transgender teenagers, many hope to receive gender-affirming care in the future. For several years, teenagers could start hormone therapy, taking either testosterone (for trans men) or estrogen (for trans women) in order to allow them to develop characteristics similar to those of the gender they identify with. The state of gender-affirming care in Florida is uncertain: A statewide ban on gender-affirming care for minors was passed in 2023, then struck down in 2024 by a ruling which was subsequently suspended later in the year. As of 2026, minors cannot receive this care. 

Even so, the possibility remains on the mind of some students, with those like John factoring it into their long-term future plans. John, like other transgender students, expects the process to take time, as few institutions offer the care they have in mind. 

“I’ve already, like, looked into the cost of [gender-affirming surgery],” John said. “By the time my name gets called, I would definitely have enough [money saved] for it. It’s also pretty hard to get approved for that stuff. That’s kind of a long time, honestly.” 

Struggles

Simply knowing one’s gender does not dispel dysphoria, and many experience poor mental health due to the acute discomfort with their body and the knowledge of how it could have been different. 

“A couple of years ago, I thought about taking a knife and cutting off my chest,” John said. “And then I actually, legitimately thought about how to do it. I wouldn’t try that now; I know it would cause nerve damage. But the thing is, if it didn’t, I might honestly consider it.” 

A 2023 CDC survey found that 26% of transgender students attempted suicide in the past year, while 5% of cisgender male and 11% of cisgender female students did the same. Another survey by the Trevor Project found that 38% of transgender girls, 39% of transgender boys and 35% of nonbinary youth had experienced or were experiencing homelessness or housing instability. 

Organizations such as OYA provide communities to youth that frequently experience mental health struggles, both in the form of safe spaces like support groups and recreational activities that allow them to connect with their peers.

“The troubles come down to where we fit in. … What we’ve got is a bunch of youth here who are out of place,” Simon said. “They don’t match the majority of the people around them. But we live in a world now where we can connect them up with each other and create a place for it, so instead of feeling rejected by everyone around them, they know that they can have a sanctuary where they go and they are accepted.” 

Many Florida laws and Seminole County policies affect transgender individuals on campus. 

The Safety In Private Spaces Act requires people to use the bathroom that aligns with their biological sex, resulting in a difficult situation for students and adults alike who appear more like their chosen gender than the one they were assigned at birth. Students have access to only one unisex bathroom on Hagerty’s campus, located in the media center (near the front office), which is out of the way of most classes. 

“I have so many friends who have to go all the way out to the genderless front office bathrooms just to use the bathroom,” Jordan said. “They don’t feel comfortable going into the men’s bathroom when they want to go into the women’s bathroom and they feel like a woman, and they look like a woman, and it sucks.” 

The Parental Rights In Education Act, passed in 2022, prohibited teachers from discussing sexuality or gender identity in classrooms, and required educators to disclose any details they learned about a student’s sexual orientation or gender identity to the student’s parents. However, as part of a settlement in 2024, teachers and students may again refer to these topics—though they cannot include them in the curriculum or as any part of instruction. 

Transgender students can also face social backlash from communities or even friends. Jay found that others in his religious group treated him differently once he came out to them. 

“When I was first figuring out my identity, I was a lot more open about it than I should have been with people that didn’t deserve to know that,” Jay said. “Because of the groups I hung out in, a lot of guys definitely knew that I wasn’t exactly gender-conforming, nor heterosexual, and they did go out of their way to say rude things to me, tell me that [I] couldn’t be religious because I was that way, and that God wouldn’t love me.” 

Even so, Jay said he remains true to his faith, while also accepting himself and his identity. 

“It’s definitely been hard, but I’ve come to terms with it,” Jay said. “Because I am Christian, I believe that there is nothing wrong with how I am, because I feel as though, if I was made this way, I was made this way. [God] made our minds.” 

The topic of gender is often treated as taboo or “adult,” which makes it difficult for transgender individuals to be judged without bias. 

“There’s definitely a lot of [society] not wanting people to know it’s important, not necessarily wanting you to present around younger children,” Jake said. “There’s just people that are going to be mean for no reason. Sometimes there’ll be slurs said to you.” 

Misunderstanding also contributes to a lack of support for transgender students.

“It hasn’t been easy,” Jay said. “I’ve been trying to help [my parents] learn the differences and understand that just because [people] look a certain way doesn’t mean that’s how they feel, and helping them learn not to be rude basically. I’ve been trying to teach them the right words to use.” 

An uncertain future 

“I’m really nervous, because … things are very negatively looked upon in the world of trans people,” Jordan said. “They’re largely discriminatory in our government right now, and so I am quite nervous about what is going to happen with me and my friends and anyone in our community.” 

The Williams Institute reported that transgender individuals experience “violent victimization, including rape, sexual assault, and aggravated or simple assault” over four times more often than cisgender individuals.

Transgender students, while taking practical steps to ensure their safety, also hope to make larger changes to the way that the world thinks of and refers to them. 

“The worst part is trying to get people to change their perspective,” Jane said. “Because a lot of people are set in [their] first impressions. … I’d say that the biggest struggle would be getting people to actually view them the way they want to be viewed, rather than just using a pronoun or a name. So instead of just managing to get somebody to use a different name and whatnot, it’s a lot harder to get people to actually see you for what you want [them] to see.” 

The future is unpredictable, but the transgender students interviewed for this article harbor hope for what it may bring. 

“I think we could all stand to learn a little bit more about the community, and not immediately just go, ‘This is something different. Why are we allowing this to exist?’” Jake said. 

Simon suggests that businesses make an effort to show their support for transgender individuals through signs and stickers, which is a common practice in the Orlando area. In Seminole County schools, teachers may emphasize that their classrooms are safe spaces for all students, but cannot display pride flags. Providing spaces in the community for transgender students to connect can also improve the social and mental state of individuals. 

“If we have an issue where there are people who hate transgender people just because they are transgender, there’s only one cure for that, and that is for the hateful people to realize there’s more to being a person than their gender identity,” Simon said. “We need to introduce what it means to be a full human being, and not just isolate these people down to their gender. The more that we focus on them being transgender people and not just people, the more we focus that there’s only one thing that matters. Well, the people who hate them only hate them for that one thing.” 

Transgender students will still go to band practice and cheer on school sports and play video games. For many, their gender identity is only a small piece of their whole identity. 

James remains optimistic for his generation. 

“I feel like this generation is a lot more open to exploring their gender identity,” James said. “I hope that they feel more comfortable thinking about how they really feel.”

Transgender individuals and other LGBTQ+ youth are encouraged to seek out Orlando Youth Alliance at orlandoyouthalliance.org or by contacting info@orlandoyouthalliance.org.Those experiencing homelessness can find help at Zebra Youth, and those struggling with mental health or considering suicide should contact the Trevor Project or speak with a school counselor.