Sober Betties: a throwback social club with a teetotaling twist

Sunset orange lipstick matches Ashaine Briscoe’s polished nails. She wears a bright yellow dress with a ruffled skirt, sipping on a pink smoothie as she tells the story of how she came up with Sober Betties.

Briscoe, an event planner, came up with the idea of doing alcohol-free events and parties because of her friend, Sarah Shoulak. Shoulak, who has been sober for over six years, asked Briscoe if she could throw a party like the ones they had been attending, but without alcohol. Briscoe said absolutely.

“It’s not about the alcohol“

“It’s not the alcohol. It’s the vibe. It’s what you create for the guests,” Briscoe said. “You put stuff in place, people will come out there, show and have fun.”

What Briscoe creates for guests is an experience allowing guests of all genders, not just women, to disappear into another time period. Briscoe encourages guests at Sober Betties parties to dress in ‘30s attire such as polkadot dresses and decorates the venues according to theme: old-school iron boards, rotary phones, vintage plush pink couches and more.

Sober Betties co-founders Ashaine Briscoe (left) and Sarah Shoulak (right) host a Sober Betties event. Photo courtesy of Amrita Ramlakhan. 

“You’re dressed up in this pinup attire. You’re yourself, but you’re not. It brings that social element out,” Briscoe said. “It brings that confidence out because you act how you dress.”

Just a touch of winged eyeliner and the right fit and flare dress gives women confidence, Shoulak said. Shoulak, who co-founded Sober Betties, said the dress-up element of Sober Betties goes a long way because of the style of the outfits.

“You could also go to Publix after and people will just be like, ‘Wow, you look great.’ No one’s going to be like, ‘What are you dressed as?’”

Briscoe says the feedback she’s gotten on Sober Betties is just people wanting more, more, more.

“I can see it trending because there’s so many people looking for that space and they don’t know where to find it,” Briscoe said. “For us this year, it’s just planning and figuring out how we can strategize to give them more of what they want.”

The “sober-curious” movement grows

 Sober Betties comes during the rise of a “sober-curious” movement, which focuses on “a more mindful approach to alcohol consumption” according to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. An American Psychological Association article states that “Sales of nonalcoholic beer, wine, and spirits were up more than 40% between 2021 and 2023” and mentions “Dry January,” a challenge where people don’t drink alcohol for the whole month, as another factor contributing to the movement. 

Data shows the sober-curious movement could be making its way onto college campuses as well. According to the American College Health Association’s National Collegiate Health Assessment, the proportion of University of Central Florida students in 2024 who reported they had never used alcohol was 30.9%, an increase of 10.4% over the year before; and 37.6% of students who said they have used alcohol before reported only using it once or twice within the last three months in 2024, reflecting an increase in sobriety from the previous year..

Jennifer Calame, a licensed clinical social worker and Assistant Director for Substance Use Disorder Services at UCF, said that she hopes to see the movement grow.

“The data that we see of the majority of students not drinking or drinking in moderation gives me an indication that it could grow,” Calame said. “So hopefully knowing that there’s options and alternatives out there, we’ll see that increase.”

Calame said the social interaction aspect of Sober Betties helps with avoiding alcohol abuse.

“I think anytime we can find those places for social connection, we need that in many areas of our life,” Calame said. “It is a significant protective factor to either treat or avoid substance use issues.”

Briscoe also stressed the importance of social interaction, saying that we need it as humans to function healthily.

“I don’t think it’s necessarily healthy for us to be so detached from other people. We love our families, but there’s more to life than just your little circle family,” Briscoe said.

Shoulak said that the organization is trying to make the concept of sobriety less taboo.

“We’re not trying to be an anti-alcohol vendetta, but we’re also trying to show that there’s other ways to be healthy and maybe have moderation or sobriety in your life without needing to look or feel like Alcoholics Anonymous,” Shoulak said.

The name for Sober Betties came from a comment Shoulak made on one of Briscoe’s Facebook posts of cupcakes where some were rum-filled. Shoulak commented “I hope that these are well-labeled so that sober Betties like me don’t accidentally partake.” Shoulak said “Betties” is a nod to both pinup model Bettie Page as well as the Hazeldon Betty Ford Foundation, which helps people with sobriety. Shoulak said the comment reflected her biggest fear with being sober.

“My big fear in sobriety is not that I’m going to relapse out of choice, but I’m going to pick up the wrong drink, or I’m going to eat something that has rum hidden in it,” Shoulak said.

Shoulak said even though Briscoe herself doesn’t struggle with alcoholism, she’s been extremely involved in the organization.

“She understands the value of having social interaction that’s not dictated by how much you’re drinking or about the fact that everybody around you is drinking. You can have those nights off and you can go in with an unaltered state and still have a really good time,” Shoulak said. “After seeing how passionate and how involved she’s been, I really do refer to her as my co-founder because she really does pull at least 50% of the weight, and I wouldn’t be able to do it the same way without her.”

A club to inspire confidence

There is more to Sober Betties than just refraining from drinking, Briscoe said. There’s also a self love and confidence element. 

“I put mirrors all around. So as you’re socializing and partying, it’s a deeper meaning. You should be happy with your face. You should look into your own soul,” Briscoe said.

Briscoe said that a lot of people are codependent on alcohol but the only thing you should be dependent on is yourself.

“You should feel good and settled in yourself. You shouldn’t have to need anything to do that,” Briscoe said. “Life is a rollercoaster, up and down, but at the core of you, you should be good with yourself.”

Briscoe said that by allowing people to look at and project onto you, you embody their perspectives and not yours, so looking at yourself is important for self love and worth.

“Discover yourself better, because people look at you all day. Do you look at yourself? Do you look into your own eyes? Do you talk to yourself? You should. It’ll change your life,” Briscoe said.